Low and Behold
by Conspiracies
Summary: Jake is slowly learning things about himself that he never wants to admit and the one guy he truly hates can see right through him. Jake/Nathan slash. -"If I say yes, then I'm gay. If I say no, then I'm lying to myself."
1. Question and Answers

**Disclaimer**: I don't anything OTH-related. Although, I would like to own CMM and James Lafferty!

**Author's Note**: I have no idea where my inspiration for this comes from. I just pulled up Microsoft Word and starting typing up a storm and this is what I came out with. It's probably not one of the better fanfictions on this site but I have to admit I shocked even myself with this one. Reading so many awesome stories probably paid off.

This is my first fanfic that I actually put up on this site. I've written before but just small little jokes between me and my friends. This story is the one I'm taking a risk with so _please_ leave constructive criticism if you feel something isn't right.

**Timeline**: While writing this I imagined it before Nathan and Peyton broke up and before Nathan met Haley. So I guess you can say it's around 1x03-ish.

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**Low and Behold**

If I answer yes, then I'm gay. If I answer no, then I'm lying to myself. I look around the room and pretend as if I didn't hear his question. I avoid any eye contact, just as I have for the last 40 or so minutes we've been in here. As I look down to the shiny wood floor, I can feel his eyes glowering towards me across the gym. The tension in the room is at its peak and if I can run out right now I'll be down the street before he can even realize I left. I hate this situation and I hate being stuck in here… with _him_ of all people.

I'm praying that Lucas or Tim will be rushing through the gym doors any minute now. A normal person could've probably circled Tree Hill once or twice in the 40 endless minutes I've been stuck in here scuffing my shoes to the floor. You'd think Nathan would know that the doors were being repaired and they can't open from the inside but noooo! And of all the hours in the week, why did he choose this hour, this Saturday? Man, God must hate me.

His eyes still haven't lifted off me. I don't have to look at him to see those eyes burning my skin. He's growing angry and quite impatient for an answer and this is my 2nd time ignoring it. I'm not much of an actor but whenever the question gets brought up then I manage to maintain a neutral face. Or so I hope.

He stomps his foot this time and raises his voice as if I was a little kid stealing cookies from the cookie jar. "It's a yes or fucking no question, double O zero!"

Double O Zero? And now I'm suddenly starting to remember why I never liked the son of a bitch. I think he's called me Jagielski maybe once or twice since I've joined the basketball team. And one of those times was before I reclined his offer to follow in his footsteps like the rest of the goons… erm, I mean teammates.

"Fine, be like that!" he spat out venomously. "I just wanted to have a fucking conversation but no, you're too good for mere mortals like me." Before the ending statement to that sentence, I _almost_ felt just the teeniest bit of sympathy for him. To be fair, he has been rather tolerable since we've been locked in here. But now, any chance he had of me talking to him has been shot down to the ground. "You and _him_ are made for each other." He muttered under his breath.

Of course this was expected. Telling me that I think I'm too good for him wasn't a good enough insult. Now he had to go for the throat. Mentioning _him_ like that in my presence just to get a reaction was a new low. And when it came to Nathan, I set no bars for him.

"Hey, shut up! You don't know what you're talking about." I shout back loudly. My voice echoed off of all four walls.

Nathan grinned slyly and turned his head to look towards me. "Oh, so now he speaks. Should I take this as your answer?"

I snorted in disgust. Nathan is truly one of the most horrible people I have ever known. "Why the hell do you hate him so much? At least your hate for me is justifiable–" he scoffed in a laughing sense when I said that. I ignored it. "but you hate _him_ for no reason. How the hell can you hate your own brother?"

Nathan jumped to his feet and glared at me straight in the eye. "He is _not_ my brother. He's just a mistake that should've been a stain on the bedsheets or burned by his slutty mom's stomach acids!"

I couldn't take this. Whether Lucas was my friend or not, I just couldn't sit there and listen to someone demean his own blood like that... and then for no good reason. And believe me, I'd played armchair psychologist of endless hours trying to find _any_ slight reason as to why Nathan hates him so much.

My first theory is that Nathan was threatened by him but that theory doesn't fit. Nathan, as much as I'd hate to admit out loud, is above and beyond any player on the team. Sure, Lucas beat him once at one-on-one but a game against your illegitimate brother can be nerve wrecking. Besides, even when Lucas's game was off on his first week on the team, Nathan was still an ass to him. That theory's out.

My second theory was that Lucas ruined Nathan's image of his dad but after hearing about Dan Scott from Lucas himself, I doubt Nathan put his dad on a moral high horse to begin with. Second theory is a scratch.

My last theory is that… Nah, I'd rather not even think of it. It's much too silly to be considered. Besides, I think that theory has a lot to do with my own personal thoughts. I'd rather not get the two different scenarios mixed up.

Anyway, back to the current situation: Nathan is pretty much going on about how Lucas shouldn't have been born (proof that theory #3 just isn't the case; so, why even make a fool of myself by mentioning it?) and I'm seriously about to lose my mind.

"Don't talk about him like that!" I blast out, pointing my fingers towards his face in a threatening way.

"Or what, fruitcake?"

My hands are instantly rolled into a fist and I keep them at my sides, praying to god that he'd just shut the fuck up before I do something I regret. Sweat is tripping off my forehead and my teeth are gritting each other against my will.

He raised an eyebrow when he sees my reaction and decided to test me. He took one step towards me and stood there with a cocky smile. I fucking hate him!

"I said 'or what, fruitcake?'"

I don't know what's coming over me. I don't even remember moving a voluntary muscle in my bone. All I remember is that my head started spinning wildly around the room. I couldn't get a steady vision on anything. I remember a few flashes of swinging arms and bloody fist. I remember hearing the gym doors unlock and hearing a bunch of yelling. Then, I slowly faded back to reality when I felt Tim's arms wrapped around my torso. He's yelling "stop" into my ear and the entire time I'm thinking, 'What the fuck are you shouting about?'

I look across the gym and Lucas is knelt down on the ground. His hands are hovering over Nathan but I can't see his face. Tim, for some reason, is still hassling me wildly in his grip.

"What the fuck did you do?!" Tim shouts in my ear. He sounds so angry and all the while I'm still trying to figure out why he's holding me. "Jake, what happened?" he asked a little calmer this time but still not letting up in his grip.

"Nathan and I were locked in here for a long time…" I paused, wondering if I should give him details on our argument. I quickly decided not to. "We got in a silly argument about something. I don't remember. And he threatened me. I blacked out after that."

Tim's grip finally loosens but he still doesn't let me go.

"I came here in the gym after Nate called me and you were standing over him and punching him, dude!" He informed me as calmly as possible.

A part of me was almost about to blurt out "he deserved it" but I didn't want to scoop down to his level. I was better than that. I was better than him. Instead, I looked across the gym and over to Lucas who is still knelt beside Nathan. Lucas is in the way of Nathan's face but I see blood on his jersey.

There was a lot of blood that I'm just noticing. There's a lot of it on my fist and a few splatters on my jersey and shoes as well. I feel for any bruises on my face and didn't find any. I noticed a cut on my lip, though. That was probably the only hit that Nathan laid on me.

"Is he fine?" I ask while standing on the tip of my toes and trying my best to see Nathan's face.

Lucas turns to look at me and I can feel my stomach drop at his sight. He looked at me like I was a monster and his eyes were wide opened and a little misty. I bit my lip and shifted a bit in Tim's grasp. I couldn't stand him looking at me like that. Was Nathan really that fucked up?

"He's going to be fine." Lucas murmured as he turned away. "He's just knocked out."

"Now what?" Tim asked with his grip tightening a smidge. I think it's obvious he's ready to throw me in a ditch somewhere.

"Forget about it. I'll take Nathan home with me. We'll figure this out tomorrow."

My stomach burned a bit when Lucas said that. After all the shit Nathan put him through. If I was Lucas, I'd probably dump his ass on the side of the road and let the circle of life take its course. I hate hearing myself think like this but Nathan is a reasonable exception. I hate hating someone but how can you argue that Nathan isn't worthy of that hate?

And to think that all of this started with just one simple question.

"_You really like the guy, don't you?"_

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**A/N**: So, that's the end of this chapter. Like I said before, if something is wrong then please let me know. Even if you don't think nothing is wrong, tell me what you think. Any decent/good comments will make my week. **Review!**


	2. Findin' Out

**Author's Notes**: Yay, next chapter up!

So, someone left a comment correcting me by letting me know that the actual phrase is Lo and Behold. I just want to clear it up that I am aware of that and the title is a play on words. I guess I wanted to identify how Jake viewed Nathan as this low human being so I guess the title was fitting.

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**Low and Behold**

I shuffled my feet to the floor as I slowly approached the door. I contemplated on if I should bring some kind of object of redemption but I wasn't really sorry for what I've done and given the current circumstances, I didn't want to send mixed signals anyway. I had my hands in my pockets and I tried not to breathe too hard. The oak wood swung open and a short, middle-aged brunette answered the door.

Her eyes studied me and for a minute I can see her scowling at my sight. I wouldn't be surprised if she knows I'm the one who hurt Nathan. Lucas did tell me once that he was extremely close with his mother… which is understandable. I reach out a hand to introduce myself.

"Hi, I'm Jake Jagielsky." I let out in my nervous state.

She forced a somewhat believable grin and shook my hand. "Hi, I'm Karen Roe. Lucas's mother."

"Nice to meet you."

I nod my head as she invites me into her house and she leads me to the far end of the hallway and opens the door. It appears to be Lucas's room. I can tell from the books that are scattered around just as casually as his CD collection. His bed is occupied by his brother, whom is sleep (thank god!). Lucas was sitting on the computer desk checking emails or something. I wasn't paying attention.

"Lucas, your friend Jake is here to see you." Karen called out with a third of her body peaked into the room.

"Heeey!" he said in a friendly tone. Honestly, after that look he gave me yesterday I was halfway expecting him to turn me around. "Come on in." he invited with his arms out and everything.

I walked into his room and tried my best not to analyze it. Apparently, he had amazing taste in books but his music was way off from what I listen to. An old guitar player like me could tune it to any old country station and strum away at my guitar for hours. I still haven't found any country CDs scattered across his dresser or his floor.

His mom left and closed the door behind her. He kicked a few things under his bed and against the wall in an attempt to make his room cleaner.

"Heh, sorry about the room, dude. I'm not used to having company other than my mom and my best friend, Haley."

I shrugged. I'm not exactly a neat-freak myself. Hell, a few clothes, books, and CDs are nothing compared to the mess my room can be at times.

"How's Nathan?" I ask as I glance over to his bed. He wasn't half as bad as I imagined. A swollen lip, a purple-ish eye, and a bruised jaw. That's it. The way Tim was reacting and Lucas was looking over at me I almost thought I killed the guy.

"He's fine. At first he was being a bitch about me bringing him here but I know he'd rather me see him than Dan." Lucas said as he walked over to Nathan and looked down at him.

"Why'd you do it?" I ask.

He didn't answer the question. He just looked over at me and squinted questionably. Shit! Maybe it's too early in the visit to have one of those heart-to-hearts. I open my mouth in an attempt to change the subject but Lucas spoke before I can think of anything productive.

"Because I wanted to prove to him that I'm nothing like him." He said with a clenched jaw and narrowed eyes. He looked down at Nathan and his expression changed. At first he seemed angry but looking at Nathan he looked empathetic and compassionate. He looked back up at me and stared at me for a minute. His eyes were burning through me just like Nathan's yesterday morning. "Why'd you beat him up?"

I swear, it took everything in me not to respond with, 'he deserved it'. Instead, I mimicked Lucas's compassionate expression and glanced over to Nathan.

"I don't know. I hardly remember anything from that gym lock-in. All I remember is that he called me a few names and then I clicked."

Lucas nodded in understanding and paced around in his room. The story, albeit true, is lacking a keen detail: Him. I can see it in his blue eyes that he's waiting for me to add a missing piece to the puzzle. He stole a glance at me and finished pacing his room dramatically. And when I say dramatic, I mean it. Chin-stroking, long struts and all. It suddenly hits me that Nathan probably told him a different story… the _real_ story.

"What did Nathan tell you?" I try my best to hide the tremble in my voice.

Lucas looked over at me and shrugged. "Same thing, basically." I can feel a 'but' coming on. "But," damn, I hate being right. "he… never mind!" he shook his head and wavered his hands in front his face.

I was ready to accept that. At this point, I'm positive Nathan told him what happened. I'm ready to pretend like none of this ever happened and go on with the rest of my high school life calmly. But… and it's a small but, but I know if I don't ask him now it's going to haunt me forever. I'd rather live the rest of my high school life in shame than never knowing what Lucas would have said if he knew the truth.

"No, Lucas. Tell me. What did Nathan tell you?"

Lucas looked up at me and gave a small nod. He started making his way towards me in the tiny spaced room. My heart dropped in my stomach like a little girl who believes any guy that approaches her likes her. And like most little girls who think that way, I got disappointed. Lucas grabbed me by my arms and dragged me out a second door in his room that leads outside.

"I didn't want Nathan to hear me." He admits while he closes the door to his room. "When I went over to see if Nathan was okay he wasn't really talking much but…" Damn Lucas and his buts. "But last night he…"

He paused for maybe 2 or 3 seconds and I was already at wit's end. I was growing so impatient by the second.

"What?"

"He kissed me." I almost thought I heard him wrong.

I looked up, shocked in expression, and open my mouth to speak but words just would not escape my lips. What would I say anyway? Would I ask him how he felt about it? How in the hell does one respond to someone telling them that their brother kissed them? Lucas can obviously see that I'm lost for words. He kind of shook his head as if what he said came out wrong or something. He bit his bottom lip and starting making voices with words I couldn't exactly understand.

"But he kissed me _after_ he called me _Jake_."

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**A/N**: Yeah, so the plot thickens! Now leave a review, please! I'm seriously lacking those for my first chapter.


	3. Water, Bridges, Conflict

**Author's Note**: I don't want to seem like a beggar or anything but where are my reviews? Does this story really suck that bad or does SLASH tend not to be popular amongst reviews?

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As I walk down the school hallway to my destination I can hear the whispers between students as I pass them. Most of them never even bothered the hide their beastly stares. And a large amount of those people were either scowling or grimacing as I passed them. It's been two full days since the incident and people are looking at me like I stabbed him in the back. Jesus Tim, how many people have you told over the weekend?!

A group of teammates were walking my way and I quickly noticed Tim's death glare in the group of posses. I dropped my head and toughened my posture as they came closer. I managed to receive a small shoulder bump from the first person to pass me but the ones after him had no mercy. I survived a few blows to the stomach, groin, and shoulder before being thrown into the lockers by Tim. I dropped down to the floor holding my stomach but not giving any of them the satisfaction of a response. Tim and the group laughed as they watch me bury my head into my knees.

"Come on, zero, fight back!" Tim snorted as he looked down on me.

"Hey, back the hell off!" I heard a familiar voice shout through the crowd.

Tim and the rest waved me off like I wasn't worth any of their time and followed the voice's command. As they scrambled off those blue eyes stood there watching me with empathy. He walked up to me and held out a hand for me. I tried my best not to show any sign off arousal from his gesture. He pulls me up to my feet with a firm grip and effortless expression. I feel like a total bitch when I think that way. Who'd a thought that simple, _'who's the new guy?'_ at first glance was going to turn into a full-out middle school crush?

"Thanks." I let out embarrassingly as I fixed my posture and dusted myself gently.

"No prob."

I straightened my standing position and tried my best to get all the nasty floor lent off my shoulders. Lucas reached over and dusted my shoulders for me.

"That's all of it." He assured me as he brushed the last piece of dust off my shoulders.

I swallowed a lump in my throat and looked down to the floor. Fuck, I fucking hate myself! If I'm blushing, even a little bit, I'm working out for 10 hours straight while drinking nothing but beer. I'm losing a bit of my manhood everyday and at first I thought it was comedic but now I'm _seriously_ starting to hate myself.

"How's Nathan?" I ask in order to break the awkward silence.

"He's doing g-…" he paused awkwardly. "Well, he's doing as _good_ as Nathan can be." He finished with a joking smile.

I nod my head in an informed manner. I clasp my hands together and rub them frantically. Lucas's face confirms that he expects one of those awkward questions to be followed. I've had a tendency to skip over the small talk lately.

"So… did he say anything about the…" I stopped. I'm pretty sure Lucas knows what I'm talking about.

He shook his head. "Heck naw, dude!" he replied real boyishly. "He doesn't remember at all and I really don't want to bring it up."

I'm actually glad he doesn't want to bring it up. I'm also glad he decided not to read too much into it.

I, personally, don't know what to think. I mean, I always had a _very_ small theory that Nathan had a thing for Lucas but _me_? Ha! Besides, I don't even know if I'm actually gay. I can honestly admit that I think of Lucas as more than a friend on many occasions but I've _never_ thought of another male that way. Lucas is my one and only exception. And even if he wasn't, Nathan is still not on my radar. I seriously hate the guy.

"You should come by and see him later on today?" Lucas's suggestion broke me out of my trance of thought.

I nod my head in agreement instantly. Way to contradict myself, no? Here I am talking about how much I hate the guy and a split second later I'm making plans to go see him later. Of course, it is easily justified with Nathan staying over by Lucas's house.

The rest of the school day was somewhat boring… except for the guys – and occasionally, girls – who were picking on me like a new kid in kindergarten. Yes, it was that bad. Spit balls, endless shoves down the hall, and a few fists to the stomach. Following my routine during the little run-in with Tim & other Nathanettes, I did nothing about the hazing. Too bad Lucas can't save me all the time.

I approached the front door step slowly. Now that my mind turns to rainbows and flowers every time I think of Lucas, I can't help but rub my stomach to get rid of the butterflies. I haven't felt this way since… since that first and last night I spent with Nikki.

I knock my fist upon the door and it literally swings open three seconds later. The bruise-less face of the raven-haired star of the Tree Hill Ravens answered the door with a grimace.

"Dad, I said no-…!" he paused as his eyes met mines. I'm contemplating if I should furrow my eyebrows in confusion and let him explain the situation which is pretty easy to figure out.

I bet Dan is making constant trips to Karen's house and begging to his son to come back home but Nathan doesn't want to deal with his overbearing dad. Especially in the state that he's in now.

"Uhhh…" I let out nervously. I had no idea what to say. The thought of Nathan answering the door never even crossed my mind.

"Hey, Jake." A voice calls out from behind Nathan. Lucas shuffles through Nathan and greets me at the door. That's the 2nd time today he's saved me.

He lets me in and I avoid eye contact with Nathan as I walk towards his room. Nathan followed Lucas inside the room and made a joke about Lucas's living condition as he wrestled him to the bed. The joke completely went over my head because I'm shocked to see Lucas and Nathan acting civil around each other. Hell, almost like brothers.

After their short game of tackle-and-noogies, Lucas stands up at his feet and glares at me. He drops his eyebrow suggestively and nudges his head backwards towards Nathan who plopped himself in bed. Obviously, he's playing peacemaker.

"Hey, Nate-"

"Forget about it, zero. Water over the bridge." He said as he cut me off.

Besides the nickname, it'd be a lie to say I wasn't taken aback by that comment. Hell, if it wasn't for the wall against my back I'd probably be laid out over the floor by now. Lucas and Nathan quickly notice my stumble and they look over at each other and chuckle.

"Really?" I ask in disbelief.

Who can blame me for being skeptic?

"Yeah, dude. I deserved it. Besides, if it wasn't for that cheap shot you wouldn't have gotten anywhere." He grinned over at me with a cocky smirk.

"Now kiss and make up!" Luke joked in between us. His head quickly fell to the floor as he realized how un-funny that sarcastic remark was considering the circumstances the other night.

The comment went over Nathan's shoulder. He let out a sarcastic "Ha, ha, ha" and raised a fist for me pump. I hate to say it but Nathan is actually not as bad as I once believed. He's being pretty damn bearable. And he has been for the entire visit.

On the long walk home I tried to consider a lot of things. One of them was about the possibility of Lucas actually having some feelings towards me. Now that I'm at the point where I can admit I have more than friendly feelings for Lucas I have to wonder if he feels the same. And even if he does or doesn't, does he suspect me?

"God, I hate myself." I shout out loud as I walk home in the dusk.

And as quick as it takes to swing a punch, it takes for me to fall to the ground. I turn around while my body is flat across the floor and I look up and squint my eyes to make out the figure of the guy standing before me. At first I thought I was seeing twos because of the blow to the head but then I started noticing different figures of bodies and they were multiplying by threes. Next thing I know, twelve bodies were towering over me and every one of them were kicking, punching, and jerking me to the gravel ground.

Like I said before: Lucas can't save me all the time.

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**A/N**: Review, people! Please. This is my first ever fanfic that I released to the public and I put a lot of heart in this. I am **extremely** grateful for the 2 reviews I actually did get by Nicole and Mandy! And Nicole, I agree, there isn't enough Jake/Nathan fanfics out there! What is wrong with fangirls these days!?


	4. Cold Front

**Author's Note**: Okay. First of all, I just want to thank Nicole and Chelsea from the bottom of my heart. Those two reviews respectively amount to 10 single reviews. Thank you guys so much!

Now, this chapter is somewhat shorter than my usual short length chapters. This is basically just a filler chapter. It was mostly written just to reveal a revelation that I'm sure most of you saw coming anyway. But fear not. I plan on having the next chapter out very soon. Hopefully by tonight or tomorrow at least.

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I stumbled across the living room, aching in pain with every step I take. I tried to take slow paces toward the door to ease the pain but the ringing of the bell is becoming a bit impatient. I waddled on over past the kitchen table and into the living room. I grab onto the doorknob and let out a sigh of triumph before opening it and seeing who's there.

I swing the door open and Nathan is standing there looking slightly embarrassed and extremely red in the face. For a minute I consider the fact that he's blushing out of embarrassment but then the cold gust hits my face and I can feel my nose reddening by the millisecond. Nathan shivers in his own arms before I motioned for him to enter the house. He followed me inside with no hesitation.

"Nathan?" I tried my best not to sound utterly shocked(although I truly was). "What are you doing here?"

Nathan pointed a thumb behind him towards the door.

"Lucas wanted to see how you were doing after hearing what happened last night," Nathan answered. "And he forced me to tag along." He told me.

Lucas is concerned about me? Please explain to me why I'm asking this question in shock? Lucas is a nice guy and he is my friend. If anything, I should've been shocked had he not decided to check on me.

I tried my best to hide the smile that forced itself on my face. Sadly, I think Nathan noticed. He smirked a little before turning around and scouting the door. It wasn't a long time in awkward silence before Lucas came charging through the door like a football player.

"Man, this cold front is no joke!" Lucas muttered inbetween shivers.

He looked up at me and his mouth dropped for a full second. He did a good job at rearranging his face before I could notice… except, I did notice. I almost forgot about the purple-ish black ring surrounding my right eye. The unsavory accessory comes complete with a deep cut across my cheekbone.

"Wow dude, they did a number on you." Lucas observed carefully as he approached me. "But the cut across face makes you look real badass."

"Ha, ha. If you're gonna do indirect quotes from books, try to pick one that's not as reknowned as The Outsiders." I joked. I'm pretty sure he knew I knew where he would have quoted that from.

Nathan snorted in the background. I almost forgot he was here. Leave it up to an intelligible conversation when you want Nathan to make disapproving noises in your presence.

"How many guys were there?" Lucas asked, completely ignoring Nathan's gesture.

"Why would you think more than one guy did this to me?"

"Come on, you can definitely handle a little hallway bullying but if someone's beating your ass in a one-on-one fight there's no way you're gonna just stand there and take it." Lucas let out in full raised eyebrow motion.

I just shook my head and attempted to ignore the question. I have no idea why I'm being so secretive about the jump. I think part of it is because, despite the asshole Nathan was, I think I deserved it. Or maybe I just feel like we're even now and resurfacing it would break the balance. Stupid reasons, I know.

"Hallway bullying?" Nathan broke the silence with his wonder. "You're being picked on at school?"

Can he be so oblivious?

"No, shit?" I spat out harshly. "I beat up the Raven's star player and the school's most popular boytoy. I'm sure they weren't going to welcome me back with chocolate chip cookies." My tone was anything but nice and normal.

Lucas looked across at me quizzically and tilted his head to the side. Nathan's hands shaped into a fist and his eyes glared at me devilishly. Despite the fact that I was mentally kicking myself for being a jerk I traded similar expressions with him.

"Fuck you, zero. I was just asking a question."

"Fuck me?" I shout back. "No, fuck you! This is all your fault. All of it!"

And the truth comes out. Honestly, I'd like to believe I'm talking about getting jumped but it's more than that. I'm barking out on Nathan because put out my feelings. Before the incident during the weekend I was perfectly fine. I obviously had more than normal feelings for Lucas but they were never brought out to the surface until Nathan mentioned it. He made me this person I've become.

I look at Nathan to see what interpretation he's making out of the argument. Just from the way his eyes softened after I said, 'all of it' tells me that he knows exactly what I'm talking about.

"Stop it!" Lucas shouts as a wall between us. "You guys were really getting along ye–"

Lucas was interrupted by the sounds of a wailing baby. Nathan and Lucas dropped their expressions and looked at each other questionably before turning to face me. I had half a mind to pretend like it was surround sound TV before sending them on their way. But I knew they weren't going to fall for that sorry excuse. I went into my bedroom, where the wailing noise took place. When I came out the room I was holding a healthy sized baby and Nathan and Lucas were both just staring at me dumbfounded.

"This is my daughter, Jenny."

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**A/N**: Haha, yeah, so that's the big revelation that I wrote this semi-fillerish chapter for. The more I read the chapter, the more I realize how much I can benefit it for later chapters. So at this point, I'll just refer to it as semi-fillerish.


	5. The Realization

**Author Note's**: Hey guys(or should I just simply say Nicole and Chelsea?). I know I promised this chapter a lot sooner than it came out. It wasn't my fault. The computer was totally acting like drama queen last week. Thank god for the Geek Squad.

Anyway, without giving too much away, this chapter is a big turning point for the story.

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I swallowed my breath as I approached the school building. It's only been two days since I missed school. My face is still a little bruised but nothing compared to two nights ago. At least the swelling around my eye went down since yesterday. My rig cage is still aching me every time my heart would beat. Ironically, the only time I can't feel the pain is when Lucas is around me.

Could that last sentence be anymore emo? Well, lucky for me, it can also slide as a chorus to a country song.

I manage to enter the building without so much attention. Don't be mistaken, there were a few wide eyes at my sight but it doesn't even come close to the attention I grabbed Monday. I was less of a ghost for beating someone up than I am for getting beat up. I don't know whether to be relieved or to wallow in self-pity for being pathetic… easy dilemma. I choose relief.

Before I can even unlock my locker I hear extremely loud shouting behind my ears from a voice that can drop my balls and pull them right back in.

"Jagielski!" Coach Durham yelled across the hall. "Get your ass over here now!"

Oh shit. With all the crap that happened in the last few days I forgot about the basketball team and life outside this high school angst. Hearing Coach's voice knocked me back into reality. Everything that happened lately feels like a lifetime ago. That fact in itself is all too ironic because even though it feels like a lifetime ago, it felt like it was happening too fast. The stuff with Nathan. The stuff with Lucas. All of it. I-

"Jagielski, what the hell?!" coach is yelling at me as I approached him within reaching distance without realizing. In result, breaking my train of thought. "Why the hell am I just hearing about some damn _brawl_ you and Scott were having in _my_ gym?!"

That's a good question actually. Why is it that he's only just hearing about it? I'd be ready to give a few reasons to that question but I'm pretty sure it was just rhetorical.

"You better be damn lucky the only way I can punish your ass is by keeping you on the damn team!" He yelled out with his index finger pointed right at my nose. "Now get out of my sight and I don't want to see your face until practice!"

I shamelessly scurried away after that last sentence and endured all the snickering from the nosey listeners in the hallway. I managed to survive the short distance back to my locker where I met none other than the blonde-haired Scott brother. It's official, timing hates me.

"Ah, nothing's better than front seats to _Public Humiliation_, starring Jake Jagielski and Coach Whitey Durham." Lucas joked as I neared my locker.

I managed to laugh through my embarrassed furrows.

"Don't sweat it, man. Coach came down hard on Nathan too." he said in comfort with a quick manly pat on the shoulders.

"You and Nathan are real close these days?" I didn't know if I was asking or confirming. His dumbfounded facial reaction showed that he didn't know my intentions either.

"Yeah. He's different than I expected," my face fell to the ground at that statement. I hate being jealous. I especially hate being jealous of Nathan, of all people. I'm not jealous in the crushing-on-someone-and-they're-crushing-on-another-person type of way. I'm just jealous that Lucas sees this amazing part of Nathan and how close they've managed to become over the past few days. "I think you knocked the good back into him."

I forced a laugh. I guess it was convincing because Lucas joined me in the short fits of laughter.

"So, about yesterday..." I muttered out sharply in the two seconds of silence we've found after laughing.

"Don't worry, man. Nathan and I won't tell anyone."

I shook my head. "Not just about that. I wanted to apologize for just going off on Nathan like that. He didn't do anything wrong."

"Tell him yourself." Lucas said as he pointed behind me.

I didn't have to turn around to know that Nathan was within hearing range. Like I said before, timing hates me.

"I heard you, Jagielski." he said as he walked in front of me and stood next to Lucas. "It's cool." he shook it off and gave me a careless smirk.

Maybe he isn't the jackass I make him out to be. This is the second time he instantly forgave me. I can't help but wonder why is he so forgiving towards me. I hate to admit but I'm starting to see this side of Nathan that Lucas brags on most of the time.

"Thanks, Nate."

He lets out a yet another small but careless smirk and nods his head.

"I'm going to class now. Later." he waved as he left Lucas and I at the locker.

Lucas turned his backpack off his back and started rummaging though it. "I almost forgot…" He pulled out a nice, thick book.

_Atlas Shrugged_

I seriously forgot that I loaned that book to Lucas. It was one of the first conversations I had with him. I wasn't aware of my little infatuation at the time but I knew I was just finding any excuse in the world to talk to him. Books seemed like an easy one since he's always reading during study hour.

"It took me a while but I finally finished it." he said as he dropped it in my locker.

"I gave it to you about two and a half weeks ago."

"How long did it take you to finish?" he puzzled.

"About three… months."

The corners of his mouth slowly curled up and suddenly he found himself holding his stomach and bursting into laughter. I joined him soon enough.

The rest of the day was just one of those boring school days. First there was homeroom, then there was class, then there was lunch, then more class, and finally basketball practice. Of course, I did have a handful of people walk up to me with genuine concern for the bruises that decorated my face. I managed to get through the entire day without a run-in with Tim and the Nathanettes.

"Lookey, lookey here!"

I spoke too soon.

I could hear the basketball shoes of many players scuff the gym floor as they approached me from behind. I turn around to see Tim leading a pack of followers towards me. He stopped at a reasonable distance and just glared at me venomously for moment.

"Fuck off, Tim." I demand after breaking the staring contest.

"Fuck off? I haven't touched you, dude."

"Oh yeah? Well, how do you explain these bruises?" I ask as I point to my face. Tim shrugged playfully with a drawed-out bottom lip. "Don't lie, Tim. I know it was you and your boyfriends who jumped me the other night."

The word boyfriend seemed to strike a nerve. His eyes narrowed the instant that word escaped my lips and I could see a demon come over him and his eyes.

"Boyfriend? You're the fucking faggot, zero!" he retorted sharply before pushing me back by a fair amount.

"Hey!" a familiar voice attended from behind the Tim's mute posse.

The voice was familiar, yes, but it wasn't the voice I would have been expecting.

"Tim? I told you to leave Jagielski alone." Nathan scolded him after making it through the pack. "Just let it go, Tim."

"But look at what he did to you." Tim said in justification.

"And look at what you did to him."

Tim looked over at me and I tried my best to stand fearless. It's not that I was scared of Tim, of all people, but we all know Jake Jagielski isn't exactly someone who'd your average Joe would be scared to challenge.

Tim nodded acceptingly and ordered off the troops before entering the gym lockers to change. Nathan stood there looking at me for a moment while I looked back. I mouthed the word "thanks" to him and he returned a small nod. As we both started walking towards the gym lockers to join the rest of our players a grating voice called out from behind.

"Scott! Jagielski!" We both froze right before the locker room entrance. I feel bad for almost anticipating basketball practice. Anyone knows Coach Whitey keeps true to his word no matter what. "Get your asses back on this court and give me 50 suicides! Now!"

Suicide? Not a bad idea.

* * *

**A/N**: Don't take the last line too seriously. I wanted to end this chapter on a more comedic note so it's only supposed to be facetious. Now, I don't want to make any promises for the next chapter. I'm honestly getting an idea for a fanfiction (yes, it's a slash couple but it may not be who you expect...). I don't want to put anything before this because this project is my baby but the lack of reviews _are_ getting to me. So now, I'm about to start shamefully begging for reviews.

Please review! I _gladly_ accept anonymous reviews! Just take 1 minute out of your busy life to tell me my story is good(or bad. Whatever) and to update as soon as possible. I swear I'll cherish it for life.


	6. Baby Steps

**Author's Note**: Hey guys! I'm glad of all the reviews I got for my last chapter. Apparently begging DOES work. ) In other news, I wrote a new story up. Yup, it's slash. Check it out if you wanna know who's the couple!

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Basketball practice was a bitch. In any case, it was never easy but the coach really had it out for me and Nathan today. It's an hour after practice is over and coach is still working me and Nathan to the bone. I don't know if he had any idea of the aching pain I was going through for getting jumped. Eventually, my body became numb. Especially anything below my ribcage. It was numb and screaming all at the same time.

Nathan and I were doing push-ups at the time. We'd been doing them non-stop for the past 10 minutes. And Coach Durham sat there with his whistle in his mouth waiting for me or Nathan to give up so he can threaten our starting positions on the team once again. The sweat from my forehead started dripping to the floor like a leaking faucet. It was fast and rhythmically dripping at every second. Nathan looked over at me as a groan escaped my lips.

"You okay, Jagielski?"

"No…" I groaned. "I can't do anymore."

"Just hang in there a little longer."

Truth be told, I would've given up a long time ago but Nathan kept me here for this long. But at this point, his enthusiasm has no effect on me. My arms are shaking so much that my voice is undeniably trembling. My ribcage is _burning_ and yet I can't feel the pain. And don't get me started on my legs. I'd be surprised if I could walk on them right now.

"I can't, Nathan. My body still hurts from when Tim jumped me."

My arms finally gave in and my chin collided with the wooden floors. A loud clap echoed through the empty gym and Coach Durham turned around with his angry eyes and intimidating fingers pointed in my direction.

"What the hell, Jagielski? I never said it was over."

Before I can even come up with some lame excuse to defend myself, Nathan stood up before me.

"Coach, he got jumped two days ago and his body is still aching. He's been working hard to stay on the team. Can we just let him go and I'll make up for whatever punishment he has."

I can't believe Nathan just said that. Not only did he just defend me but now he's willing to take my punishment too?

Coach waved it off and started walking off. "Both of you will make up time later. I can't have you two getting off easy for fighting in my gym."

And those were the last words he said before he grabbed his coaching bag and left outside the gym. Me and Nathan(I know, I know. That's grammatically incorrect) were in the locker room together and getting all that was left. It was pretty quiet for the while that we were in there. The only noises were my feet clapping up against the damp, gravel ground and the shower water running.

When we started to dress ourselves I saw him leaning against his locker. My shoes skidded across the floor as I paused abruptly.

"I'll drive you home, Jagielski?"

His tone was very imperious but his frows showed an expression of question. I nodded vigorously and followed him outside to his car. When I finally got in the car I took a deep breath before he entered on his side. I had I feeling I wasn't going to be breathing any easier for the short but tense ride to my house.

I was right. The ride was short and the noises of my heavy breathing got drowned out by the rap music Nathan chose to play. He drove a short mile upward and stopped in front my house. He turned down his stereo as he stopped in front my house.

"Thanks." I said with a nod.

"No problem."

"Not just with the car ride but for everything. And for defending me with Tim and Whitey also."

"You have a daughter at home waiting for you. I couldn't let him hold you that long after practice." Nathan said.

I let out a smile and opened the car door. As I made my way outside the car I gave Nathan a friendly invitation with a nice wave. I was surprised when I heard the car engine stop and saw his shadow grow on the floor beneath me. I walked inside my house and he followed.

I was somewhat embarrassed. The weather was kind of shamefully warm and it had the stench of dirty diapers. My mom and dad were, as always, cooped in their room and my little angel was lying in her crib and staring at the ceiling. I towered her and started cooing at her. She gave me one of the brightest smiles I'd seen her give me in weeks. Then, I turned around and noticed Nathan was directly behind me and looking down at the baby too.

She held her hands out and started reaching for Nathan. This was strange. She was far from a spoiled baby and she had no problems being held by strangers but she never took to them as she has with Nathan. This was only her second time seeing him and she's reaching out for him like he's her father. Nathan's reaction showed that he was just as shocked as I was. He took a big step away from the crib and looked at me quizzically.

"She wants to hold you, Scott." I assured him.

"I don't… I never…"

"She doesn't bite, I swear." I joked. Nathan needed the comic relief. He was so tense I can hear his neck creak as it turns.

He chuckled a little bit. Obviously force. "I never held a baby before."

"There's a first time for everything."

"I don't want to break her." He protested.

"Come on, I'll help you." I said as I grabbed Jenny from her crib and held her in my arms.

I approached Nathan slowly with unnoticeable steps. Jenny took various different eye shifts between me and Nathan.

"Hold your hands out," I demanded. "like this." I said as I motioned him to wrap his forearms around each other like I have.

I slowly placed Jenny into his arms and made sure her head was supported in them. He stuttered a bit as I did so but his face lit up when she smiled at him. In a small way, he reminded me of myself when I held Jenny. I was told – from the very first day I held her in the hospital – that I look like I don't have a care in the world when I'm holding her arms. Well, if I look the way Nathan looks right now then I know what people mean by that.

"She really likes you, Nate." I said as I watched them on the couch.

"She's falling asleep." He answered me back.

"Then she must _really_ like you. The only people who are able to send her to sleep are me and my mom."

Nathan's extraordinary smile grew even brighter. He started talking to Jenny as her eyes closed. He was just like my mom. They both seemed to think she listens to them while she's sleeping. But whatever he was telling her at the moment went right over my head.

"Here, Jake, she's sleep." He said as he walked towards me and slowly but carefully handed her to me.

After placing her back in her crib I turned around to Nathan and gave him a subtle smile. "You called me Jake."

"That's your name."

"But you usually call me Zero or Jagielski."

Nathan shrugged it off carefully and walked the short distance towards the door. "I'm going home now. Thanks for inviting me in."

I nodded.

Nathan was long gone before it I came to the realization that I passively compared Nathan to myself. It's truly amazing how quickly my opinion changed about the guy. A week ago I _hated_ him and I thought nothing highly of him at all but now I see this huge sensitive side to him.

People _can_ surprise you.

* * *

**A/N**: Yet another big step in the J/N friendship. I'm actually pretty torn between keeping them as friends for a little while longer or taking _the_ big step with them very soon. I guess we'll see during the next few updates.


	7. Surprise, Surpise

**Author's Note**:I'm so sorry it took me forever to update this story, guys! In my defense, I've never abandoned the story. The reason it took so long to make was because I was unhappy with my results. You guys have no idea how frustrating this chapter was to write. I rewrote it like 50 million times and every time I write it then it ends in a different way. I have so many different ideas that I'm conflicting myself. But I'm ultimately glad with the way it ended here.

* * *

Peyton Sawyer is her name. She's skinny, curly blonde, and she's my partner for the in-class English assignment. I recognize her from pictures in Nathan's room. She's his confidante and on most days of the week she's his girlfriend. He didn't talk about her much during the last week or so that we've been hanging out but he said enough so that she isn't a _complete_ stranger to me.

"Jake, right?" she said in an introductive manner as she scooted her desk over to mines.

"Yeah. And you're…?" I pretended as if I didn't know her. I'm pretty sure she wouldn't have been to pleased at knowing that Nathan speaks about her sometimes.

"Peyton."

"Ah, Peyton." I said as I snapped my fingers, pretending like her name was at the tip of my tongue.

Peyton glared at me with a half-smirk and half-intimidating glare. I started to pretend as if I didn't know why she was doing that but I'm pretty sure she could tell that I was acting. I'm not very good at pretending.

"What?" I asked as innocently as possible as her eyes fixated themselves on me.

"You mean to tell me that your new best friend – Nathan – never said a word about me?"

Busted! I couldn't really say anything. All I could do is laugh it off and ignore the question. I shouldn't be too surprised if she asks me again. I've noticed that this whole 'ignore the question' tactic has been very unsuccessful as of late.

"I'm gonna take this awkward silence as a 'yes'." Peyton answered for me.

I just laughed in defeat and looked down at the work I've done so far. It should come as no surprise that my paper was empty. I have no idea where my thoughts were wandering lately but I can shamelessly say they haven't been under control. I think that I think about stuff so much that when I try to think about what I'm thinking about I go blank. Oh crap! Now I'm thinking about thinking?

"Are you okay?" I managed to hear Peyton ask while I try to get a grip of myself.

"Yeah…" I lied unconvincingly. "Why?"

"You look like you're having a freaking migraine mixed with a heart attack over there."

I just shook my head and inhaled a silent breath. I was hoping she hadn't noticed my attempt at subtle breathing.

"And now you're kind of breathing a little weird."

I couldn't help but laugh. I'm realizing that Peyton Sawyer is very an observant blonde. It's only fair that I return the favor by giving her a friendly analyzing. The very first thing I noticed was that her roots weren't blonde. Secondly, I noticed that a pencil is steady in her hand and her English notebook is wide open but there's no classwork on her paper.

"So, what do you draw?" I asked her in my most casual tone.

She tilted her head a bit in a razzled manner. She quickly shook her expression off and went back into her half-broody, half-deadpan expression. She slouched into her a chair a little and flipped the pages in her book. As she quickly skimmed through her pages I noticed a few cartoons from the newspaper. She threw the book at me and gave a cocky smirk.

"I draw anything," she answered my question that I nearly forgotten I've asked. "But most times, I just draw what I see."

I could practically feel my chin continuously clapping the floor as I looked down at her sketch. It was a still. The setting took place in the halls of this school. I could see the detail in almost every locker. Every familiar dent, scratch, and banner that stood out in a specific area of the hall was drawn in perfect detail. The kids all walked past the hall like it was a blur. All except one kid. He was considerably average height. His hair was short with a hint of curls. He stood awkwardly in the middle of all the students and watched them with a wide gaze.

"Is that…?" I couldn't finish the question because I was still kind of shocked.

"Yeah. That's you." She answered me with a lopsided beam directed towards me.

"Why did you draw _me_?" I asked with a very big emphasis on "me". I mean, I'm not really that interesting. I obsessively listen to country music for god's sake.

Peyton shrugged at the question. "I don't know," she replied with an overdramatic drawn-out pout. "I see you down the halls, mostly alone, and I see you look around the school…" she paused. "It looks like you're… looking for answers to life or something." I couldn't say a word. I gazed at her with narrow eyes and open mouth. "Or maybe not." She blurted out embarrassingly.

"No. You're not wrong. You're not wrong at all." I gave her a smile.

Peyton dropped her head a little bit after smiling sheepishly at me and I noticed how she continuously gave me quick glances while her head was down. I can already tell there was more that she was contemplating on talking about or asking me. Her relationship with Nathan is pretty unstable; it'll be no shocker if she wanted to hear his point-of-view from a friend of his.

"What is it?" I asked her under a friendly chuckle.

"I can tell…" she paused dramatically. "I can tell that you like _someone_."

Damn! I'm hoping that the throat lump that I just swallowed wasn't too obvious because apparently Peyton can read me like a book.

"Who are you talking about?" I asked, trying to play it cool as if I have no idea what she talking about when on the inside I'm like panicking like a sunuvabitch right now. "I don't like anyone."

Peyton shrugged. "Maybe I'm wrong. I'm just calling it how I see it."

"And what do you see?" I asked like an idiot. I should have just let her drop it right there.

"I see how you look at…" she leaned in closer to me and gave me a whisper. "Lucas Scott."

Oh. My. Fucking. God.

BUSTED!

Okay, I have two options right now. One: Laugh it off and pretend like she's damn crazy. Hell, from the stories Nathan tell me she very well could be. Or two: Just tell her the truth and beg her to keep it a secret.

"Don't worry. It'll be our little secret." She assured me, breaking my thoughts. "I, personally, think you should give it a shot."

I couldn't hold in my sarcastic 'as-if' laugh. Telling Lucas that I'm kind of gay is one thing but telling him I have a school girl crush on him is pushing my luck. I'd rather do the smart thing and keep my mouth shut… or something to that affect.

The school bell finally rung and I'd've thought I would want nothing more than to grab my bag and get the hell out of Tree Hill but that's not how I feel at all. I'm actually relieved that someone… _anyone_, knows my secret. It's been eating me up for long time and now I can talk about it to someone other than myself.

As I walked down the hall, side-by-side with Peyton, we met Lucas and Nathan near their lockers. Peyton playfully wrapped her arms around the back of Nathan's neck. I collided fists with both Lucas and Nathan and then gave Peyton a smile.

"I see you two have gotten to know each other." Nathan observed.

"Yup. And he told me everything you said about me!" Peyton joked.

I assured him she was joking by shaking my head but he laughed it off before glancing over at me. I guess he already knew I was joking. Peyton walked a little closer to Nathan and poked him playfully. He gave her a smile and then wrapped his arms around her before they walked down the hall to class. Lucas stood there still scrambling inside his locker.

I contemplated walking off and I guess Lucas could see it in the back-and-forth step show I just did.

"Where are you going?" he asked as he filled his backpack with a couple of books. "I thought we had English Literature together?"

"I'm not walking off," I lied. "I'm waiting for you."

"Early bird." The blonde labeled me with a snorting laugh.

"Bookworm." I retorted with a mocking laugh.

Is it just me or does our nicknames imply some sort of sexual innuendo? You know, they always say the early bird gets the worm…

[Ring Ring]

We were nearly a few baby steps away from class and then his phone just rings. Timing once again proves to dislike me.

"Hey mom, what's up?" He said as the phone went up to his ear.

I started stomping my feet a little impatiently and exchanged an impatient gaze with him as he glanced up at me. He looked back down and held the phone closer to his ear like he was at a party and couldn't hear a word.

"Mom. Stop." His voice is cracking and his serious face became so much more serious. "You're not making any sense!" he shouted into the phone.

"Luke?" I called to his attention.

I extended my hand and gripped the lace of his mom's café hoody. It was a reflex and I never gave a thought as to why I did it but I felt like it was necessary. It was.

"Keith…"

That was the last word he said before his knees collapsed on the hallway tile and his eyes set off into a mindless gaze at the fluorescent lighting that lit the halls. I know what just happened. I don't want to say it out loud, just in case I'm wrong, but I know it. I probably don't know the full details but I know that…

"Lucas?" I called as I knelt before him. "Luke…" What the hell was I going to say? '_I'm sorry_'? What should I do? What _can_ I do?

As I try my best to get my stupid thoughts together I feel the weight of the world fall on my shoulders.

Lucas is sobbing.

I can feel his sobbing movements on my shoulders and I can feel the onslaught of tears soaking through the cotton of my coat and onto my shoulder blade. I can feel Lucas's hands lifelessly resting in my lap like birds to its nest. I can feel his spine tingle in concurrent of his howling as my arms wrap themselves around him. I can feel my chin settling perfectly into his shoulder as his do mine.

But most of all I can feel _him_.

* * *

**A/N**: Okay, I think that I definitely took this story to a new aspect. I definitely won't ignore or deny the development I've added between Jake and Lucas just now. In a way, with this chapter, I feel like the story is only just beginning.

You guys have no idea how glad I am to finally finish this chapter and be glad with my end result. I've written this chapter _so_ many times that I've lost count at this point. There were a _lot_ of different alternates to this chapter. Some of which were pretty filler-ish and others just brought out the big picture much too quick (one attempt even had a sex scene – of whom I won't share the two participants).

Anyway, with this chapter I think it's definitely turned into a big Nathan/Jake/Lucas triangle and to be honest, I'm not making any promises on who is endgame. I just know that the triangle isn't so much in subtext anymore. And while these 7 chapters have been about Jake and his feelings for Lucas, I still think Jake and Nathan's relationship is the most important aspect of the story (and I promise to make that fact more evident in future chapters).


	8. Church Bells

**Author's Note**: Gosh, I'm so sorry it took me forever to upload chapter 8. I don't even have an excuse good enough to justify such a long wait. Inspiration is hard to come by when the days of the week fly by so fast. I hope this chapter more than makes up for the wait.

* * *

**Low and Behold**

_All it takes is one highway accident to end it._

I slowly analyzed the church as walked through the archway. I've never, in my entire life, seen so many sad faces at once. There was sobbing from all four directions and hysterical crying on at least two. Everyone's head was crouch down with their chins nearly digging in their chest. The casket at the end of the aisle was the last thing I took note of after entering the church.

My eyes searched the room for Lucas but he was nowhere to be found. My hands were in my pocket and my head was down and searching the floor for anything to keep me from thinking so much.

"Jake," a feminine voice surprised me from behind. "I didn't know you were coming."

"I didn't know _you_ were coming," I said as I pointed to the curly blonde in front of me. "Since when did you and Lucas become tight?"

Peyton tilted her head a bit. She looked at me like she told a simple joke or something and I didn't catch it. "I'm not here for Lucas," she said. "I'm here for _Nathan_."

And now I feel like the king of douchebaggy assholes. I don't even know how to begin to pretend like I was kidding or something. All week long I've been looking out for Lucas and making sure he's doing okay and I never once checked up on Nathan about it.

Keith was his uncle, too.

"Where is Nathan?" I asked. Now's a better chance than ever to let him know that I'm here for him.

Peyton shrugged. "I came over here to you and when I turned around he was gone," she pointed to a Nathan's dad across the other side of the church. "He did say he was going to avoid Dan at all cost."

I shivered at his name. From what Nathan tells me, he's not the type of guy who you'd want to be your workout partner.

"Yeah, I bet."

And just as I glanced over to my side, I see Lucas standing against the wall on his own with his hands in his pocket and eyes as misty as ever. I frowned when I saw how much this hurting him. I couldn't even imagine. Keith was like a father to Lucas. Me and my father aren't exactly best buds but I can't imagine my life with him so I don't even want to know how much this is truly affecting Lucas.

"You should go talk to him." Peyton suggested. "I know you want to."

"But what if he just wants to be alone," she should've known I was going to rationalize this. It's instinct "It looks like he wants to be alone."

"Who would _want_ to be alone at a time like this?"

"He's at a funeral with family members everywhere and he's standing against the wall by himself..." I looked around the room with a 'do ya see?' expression on my face. "I can tell he just wants to be alone."

"Or maybe he's just waiting for the right person to come talk to him."

I've got to be honest: Peyton is a helluva debater. I bet she hands Nathan his ass on a platter every time they argue.

"Trust me, Jake. I know what he's going through."

And with that statement, I grasped Peyton's hand and stroked it gently before throwing her a sympathetic smile. She returned a similar smile and then her eyes motioned me to talk to Lucas. I obliged.

"Luke?" I called to him lowly as I approached him.

He looked up at me with relieved expression. He got up from the wall and walked towards me. For a minute I thought he was going to walk right past me but then I found myself in his embrace. "I'm glad you made it, Jake."

"I wouldn't miss it." I replied in his ear.

I felt so secure in his arms. He held me tight. Tighter than I'd ever been held before. It was like he was scared I was going to let of him. I could feel his breath trinkle on my earlobe at every heavy pant. His scent was extraordinary in words I couldn't even begin to describe.

"I never got to thank you for looking after me this entire week. I probably would have gone insane without you." He broke the hug and looked at me with oceanic eyes. They were so close to mine I can almost see through them.

A breath escaped Lucas's mouth like he wanted to say something but nothing would come out.

"You're welcome, Lucas." I didn't know what else to say or a better way to say it.

Lucas smiled. Yes, an actual genuine smile escaped through his red, misty eyes and auto-frown.

Then, right behind Lucas I saw a tall, raven-haired figure escape into the men's bathroom. I gave Lucas a smile and a pat on the back and then I walked into the bathroom without a second thought.

"Nathan," I said to him as I walked over next to him.

He was standing over the sink and mirror and splashing water on his face.

"How are you doing?"

Nathan exhaled a deep breath and started pacing.

"Can you believe you're the _first_ person to ask me that all day?" I don't think it was a real question but for some reason I was tempted to answer him. I truly couldn't believe I was the first person to ask that. "You're only the _second_ person to ask me that all week. The principal asked me how was I doing about 2 days ago."

"Nathan, I…" I paused. "I don't know what to say." I stuttered. He continued pacing in the bathroom and it was hard to keep direct eye contact with him when he's moving all over the place. I grabbed him when he came close to me and halted him to a pause. "Keep still."

"How am I supposed to feel, Jagielsky?" he asked. His face was serious and I can hear his voice cracking "Am I supposed to be sad? I hardly even knew him—" he sucked in a hollow breath and gripped my wrist. "And now I'll never get the chance."

The one day I could put my extensive vocabulary and precocious wisdom to use I can't find one word to say.

"I'm here, Nate?"

"Are you?" Nathan's eyes narrowed and grip on my wrist became tighter. "Can you see me right now, Jagielsky?"

"Of course I can see you." I answered in confusion.

"Then why are you so fucking blind?!"

It happened so fast I never saw it coming. His hands were holding my face like a basketball. They were tight but delicate all at the same time. I could feel how sweaty his palms were on my cheek. I could feel his lips. They collided against mine so quick I thought they were fist at first. My eyes were closed and the whole world disappeared for a brief second. When I opened them Nathan was staring at me with his gray-blue eyes and a face of pure despair. I knew, at that moment, he was just as confused about what he did as I was.

"Fuck!" he whispered under his breath. "I've got to, Jagielsky."

And without even looking back to glance at me, he left the bathroom with a door slam.

* * *

**A/N**: So, what did you think? Too much drama? The right amount of drama? What's your stance on the whole Lucas/Jake/Nathan triangle I'm setting up here. Jake/Nathan are, without a doubt, the heart of the story but I always had my soft spot for Lake and I can't help but add that into the story. I'd like to know what everyone else feels about it. Should I explore it a lot more or what?


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